Abortion

I figured I may aswell get this one out of the way now. It's something I feel rather strongly about. I was adopted, my birth mother was 15 when she concieved and 16 when she gave birth - I could have easily been aborted. That said, as much as I am against abortion, it is the mother's choice in the end and I generally aim to make sure people can make informed decisions.

First of all, I am a firm believer in realising the possible consequences of your actions. If you are having sex, protected or not, no matter how old you are, you should already have an idea of what you would do if you got pregnant because it's always possible unless you abstain completely. That said, if you are having unprotected sex (or using a method such as the pill instead of a barrier method like a condom) you also need to realise that you are not protected from STDs (someome remind me and I'll rant about STDs in a later post).

There are a few options open to young mothers: keeping the baby, putting it up for adoption, or abortion.

If you want to keep it, you need to make sure you will actually be able to care for it. Will the father stay around to help support it? Will your parents be willing to help? Also look into government programs available to you. You also need to take a step back and consider where you are in life. If you're still in school, you'll need to figure out how this will affect your life and have some sort of long term plan. Dropping out and permanently doing minimum wage jobs isn't likely to be good for you or your baby.

If it is not plausible for you to keep it, then look into adoption. I don't know much about how adoption works in other countries, but I know that in Canada when you put a child up for adoption you have all sorts of options now. When I was adopted it was agreed that I would not be able to contact my birth mother until I turned 18 (though the government is a little slow and I still haven't tracked her down...). My birth mother and my parents could send letters to each other through CAS (Children's Aid Society) but their information was kept private from each other (limited to first names). Now, however, you can choose to be more involved in the child's life. I know people who see their kids every weekend, as a family friend or an aunt or something of the sort. It's all a legal agreement, you need to sort out a contract between yourself and the people you have chosen to care for your child (yes, you can decide to hand pick your child's parents).

Of course, the last option is abortion. If you are considering this option, I have to ask that you have also considered the others, and that your reasoning is secure. In my opinion, reasons such as "I don't want to tell my mom" do not count in this situation. If you are old enough to be having sex, you should be old enough to recognise the possible consequencces of your actions and accept them.

Also make sure you research abortion procedures before actually getting an abortion. I come across people all the time who have had an abortion, then start second guessing themselves and want to know exactly what happened to their child (in short, it is surgically removed and then thrown in with the other hospital waste and likely incinerated).

As I said, whether or not you get an abortion is up to you, but make sure you have considered all the options and you are ok with your decision. This is not a decision you should make based on your friends', boyfriend's or even parents' ideas. You need to do what you think is right and make a decision you know you will be able to live with.

If you keep the child, will you be able to support it and will you and your child be happy?
If you put it up for adoption, will you be able to get on with your life knowing that you made the right decision and chose a good set of parents to raise him or her?
If you get an abortion, will you be able to live with it or will you spend the rest of your life regretting the decision?

I know it's not an easy decision to make, but it is an important one, and too many people jump to abortion without thinking.